Midyear Reflection: 6 Months into 2019
Updated: Jun 24, 2019
Unlike last year, these six months of 2019 have been my revolution. "Turns out my life purpose isn't supposed to be as small and silent and accommodating and convenient as possible." –koreen, @werenotreallystrangers
To say 2018 was "tough" for my family and me would be a gross understatement.
After dealing with a sudden (but temporary) health scare, uprooting my life in Atlanta and shedding the reality I'd grown comfortable with, I started anew back home in fall of last year. Seconds before the first of this year, mom and I clutched each other in our living room, pajamas and all, ready to leave 2018 behind: to let go and move on.
Since then, I've done way more than expected for someone who lost so much. Instead, I put myself back together into a fuller, stronger, bolder and more joyful person.
6 Lessons Learned During These 6 Months of 2019
I now know that I don't want to live any other way than in this beautiful dance with change, walking alongside gratitude and basking in hope. Here's what I've learned in my journey so far.
1. Reframe loss as an opportunity
Loss is to gain as the moon is to the sun. Without one, we can't have or even appreciate the other. Both this year and last have been pierced by bits of disappointment, often without warning, but I've learned the sooner you accept, the sooner you heal. Reframing each ending as a beginning is key to being thankful for what doesn't serve us and looking forward to what will. The Universe is looking out for you and me.
2. Prioritize pleasure
We're taught that adult life is suffering, and it can be, but I prefer to see it as a winding path that brings both pain and pleasure. It's our job to create the pleasure for relief as we process the pain. What does this look like for our day-to-day? A deep, calming breath during difficult moments. Walking your dog while disconnecting from tech. Dancing in your kitchen as you prep your meals for the week. It may be cliché, but that doesn't make it untrue: the best things in life are the little things that bring us pleasure, if we have the awareness to notice them.
3. Be choosey with your community
I've noticed a significant shift in my social (and overall) life because of how my circle's evolved since last year. You can read more about that here, but the key is being intentional about your relationships, choosing to surround yourself with people who root for your success, wellness and happiness. I feel refreshed and supported after spending time with my friends and it's been integral for my healing and growth.
4. Stay curious
Never stop learning: about yourself, your loved ones, what excites you and the unknown. In the last six months, I've picked up new hobbies, discovered interests, deepened relationships with family members and have become a fuller self because of it. Try to avoid getting "comfortable" with your current situation, because comfortable means stagnancy and stagnancy means you're not evolving into a more fulfilled person.
5. Let go of the idea that you are for everyone
Placing your joy in the hands of outer circumstances that may change from one moment to another or of people who may not be good for you, will just pull you further away from your authentic path. Releasing yourself from that pressure will give you the freedom to be who you want to be, do what you want to do, because the Universe rewards those who live their truth.
6. Lean in to how you feel without judgement
Finally (and thanks to those who stuck around!), don't let anyone tell you that you have to be happy all the time. That is not possible, nor is it healthy. Everlasting happiness is an unfair standard to hold yourself to. It is okay to be sad, frustrated, mad, confused or even feel something that doesn't have a name. Welcome the feeling, give it a home, let it visit and then walk it out the front door. Feel what you freaking feel.
Here's to a beautiful rest of the year!